Saturday, March 21, 2015

What's Right About Family Members, What's Wrong

When it comes to thinking about what's right about family, words come to mind like: love, patience, peace, money, fun, and laughter.  When I think of what is wrong when it comes to family, I see words like: pain, discovery, hope, help, anger, abuse, rage, sadness, and regret.

So much time wasted over the years with strange people who liked the sound of saying things like, "I love you...I will help you...Don't worry...Be good..." yet failed miserably at being good examples (of course some, not all).  I think of those who meant well, but had far too many demons in their closets to help anyone much less themselves.

I have been hopeful over the years that the sick, confused, and blind family members will be made well.  I have wished that widows would find love again and broken-hearted mothers would do other things with their lives besides provoke their children to anger with all their unreasonable requests.

Family just doesn't mean the same for all people.  Those that I have witnessed who truly loved their families took the bitter with the sweet and worked together so that all in their circle could live reasonably well.  However, those who claimed to love their families didn't do anything more than to make bad situations worse with all their lies, exaggerations, gas lighting, fighting, and more.  Then these same individuals would act as if nothing they did was ever wrong!

I think when you have a great set of relatives, you should appreciate them.  Show them just how much you care and offer service every now and again.  But when you have toxic relatives, you should go no contact, and find a new family.  Adopt parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, nieces, nephews, cousins, and others who can show you love and enjoy your presence.  I personally believe there is a Creator who allows such things to happen.  New people are welcomed into lives while old people are pushed out.  I hope for nothing but the best for those of you who honestly desire healthy relationships and that you will sincerely find what you have been looking for before you close your eyes forever.

Nicholl McGuire

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