How Enlightened Families Argue

The Wish that Relatives Would See the Light - Not Everyone is Sane in the Family

People who are mentally ill don't know that they are.  If they detect something is not quite right with themselves, they work hard to cover up their insanity.  All of their tactics of blaming, denying, minimizing, abusing, and using others are excellent tools to keep the unsuspecting in the dark. 

Sometimes it takes years for hurting family members to separate the truth from the lies, but by the time this happens victims want nothing to do with them. 

"After all these years you believed I was the crazy one when your parents were really the nuts!"

"You thought I had something to do with that?  Your crazy brother was at fault!"

"Why didn't you ever bother to pick up the phone and find out what exactly I supposedly said or what occurred over at the house?"

Some partially insane folks have enough sense to create smokescreens so if you aren't discerning and don't bother questioning what you think you might know based on what they told you, you will believe almost anything.

The next time a loved one tells you something, think before you speak, "What really happened?  What did he/she do the reason why her children, siblings, etc. are distant?  Why doesn't my relative do more with her life besides talk negatively about others?"

Hold your judgment and know that with some people they don't want you to ever find out just how cold-bloodied and cruel they really are.  Watch as well as pray!

Nicholl McGuire has had her share of experiences with narcissists, substance abusers, and those who walk on the dark side.  Check out her practical guides at this site.

Nasty Ways of the Narcissistic Kinfolk - Family Problems, Favoritism, Ho...

Keep Children in View - No Playing House, In a Car Alone, Hiding from Others

With all the merry-making some parents, grandparents and other adults are not paying much attention to children, but they should be especially in homes where there are many rooms, wide open spaces to hide, and yards that can't be seen from windows.

So many children end up being sexually abused because parents, who are high on drugs and alcohol, are not watching them!  These kids are lured by strange adults, ornery teens and abused children to go into parked cars, dark rooms, basements, and other hiding places away from watchful eyes.  Children are bullied, sexually abused, teased, pressured to drink or use drugs, and more in those areas.

Who will hear screams when music is being played loudly?  Who will notice when children are away to long with an Uncle, Cousin, Aunt or someone else?  Who is watching when kids are so-called "just playing"?

Keep children in view or else cry later.

Nicholl McGuire is the author of When Mothers Cry and shares thoughtful wisdom on Spreaker.

Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate: Signs of Physical-Sexual Child Abuse in Adults

Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate: Signs of Physical-Sexual Child Abuse in Adults: As an adult have you experienced-but not limited to the following? • Little or no memory of childhood-age 3 to 12 • Trouble with relations...

How To Deal With Controlling Parents - Get Rid of Negative Influences - Take Control of Your Life

The Next Level is Going to Cost You - Advisers Who Encourage Costly Activities

Getting married, going to college, getting another job, starting a business, having children, buy a house, and more costs money.  But sometimes well-wishers and advisers don't think before they speak.  Are they helping?  http://share.myflare.com/3bLM39

A Word from Family Article Writer and Owner

I just wanted to take this moment to thank the contributors of this blog and all those who have shared their entries.  I am so glad that so many in difficult families have found this work useful.  I look forward to having an even better year and wishing you and your family the best!

At this time we are welcoming any contributors who would like to be featured for solving their family related challenges.  Also any individual or business who would like to purchase ad space, do make contact.

Feel free to reply to this post or contact me at nichollmcguire@gmail.com

Nicholl McGuire is the manager of this blog, a self-published author, inspirational speaker, and business owner originally from Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. She has been a featured guest on television and radio talk shows such as CBS and WPXI Channel 11.

Healthy Families Bring Happiness

No matter where you are in the world when surrounded by people who genuinely love you with no strings attached, you can't help but thrive in circles like this.  Whether family or not, love is the common denominator.

When a family has stopped loving, there is sure to be no more unions.  Appreciate those who care for you and enjoy your company.  Happy people encourage happy thoughts and help cultivate strong bonds.  Negative people only create sorrow, worry, and confusion. 

Choose the company you keep wisely.

Nicholl McGuire is the author of Should I Go to the Party? on Smashwords.com

Some People will Never Change Don't Let Family, Former Friends Upset You This Holiday Season

You helped people. Did the best you could doing for them 

and sometimes your best wasn't good enough. 

For years, you listened to things you really didn't want, went places when you preferred to stay home, and did other people-pleasing things.  Now that you aren't doing as much or nothing at all for those same people (possibly drawing a line in the sand with them--establishing boundaries), those same individuals look to pay you back for every time they felt offended due to:  your not answering their calls promptly, visiting them when invited, or offering your assistance when needed.

You went from being a God-sent angel in your emotionally unstable relatives' eyes to just another you fill in the blank.  People like this don't think outside of their emotions.  Oftentimes illogical, they are hard to please anyway.  The more you do, the more they want.  You feel angry, bitter, and might think negatively about them, but don't!  Allow yourself to detach and move on to greener pastures that are emotionally freeing and not physically draining or binding.

Enjoy your holiday season in peace and avoid those emotions that others want you to have because they are so miserable.  We have one life to live, so use it wisely!  Spend time with people who you enjoy being around whether family or not!

Nicholl McGuire is the author of Should I Go to the Party? and other emotionally freeing books.

How To Outsmart A Narcissist The Right Way - Melanie Tonia Evans

Issues with Sibling? Trusting in Your Sibling to Make Life Choices

 

Watch as well as pray when seeking counsel from a sibling.  Also, notice your partner choices if you are dating, are you connecting with someone who reminds you of a sibling's personality?  Listen here: http://share.myflare.com/T3Yfyb  Check out more audio on YouTube channel: nmenterprise7

Repressed Memories - Childhood, Abuse, Family - Video Dailymotion

Repressed Memories - Childhood, Abuse, Family - Video Dailymotion

The "Yes" Men and Women in the Family

They say yes to the men who abuse them and yes to the women who curse them.  They say yes to their mothers even when they shouldn't and yes to dads when they really don't want to.  

Know some folks like this?  

I wrote nonfiction books for those who consider themselves to be "Yes" people that really should be saying, "No way!"  Stop being tempted to say, "yes" when you really mean, "no."

Tell Me Mother You're Sorry

Say Goodbye to Dad

She's Crazy

Socially Sweet, Privately Cruel Abusive Men

When Family Members Don't Wish You Well - Pessimistic and Proud Kinfolk

You didn't do what a relative wanted, you behaved in ways that upset one or more than a few members in your family, or maybe you aren't guilty of anything but being wiser, smarter, better, and more accomplished than most of your relatives.  No one is condemning you here.

Some people are just not going to behave nicely whether you talk to them much or very little.  These same people are the customers we see holding up the lines in stores arguing about little things while wanting some of us standing behind them to co-sign on their rants.  I think to myself, "You probably are a problem at home too."

Miserable people can't formulate their mouths to wish you well.  How can they when they look in the mirror everyday and see that they didn't do much in life but work, complain, have babies, complain some more, spend money, save money, and you know the rest.  A lifestyle that is okay, but unsatisfying is not what any of us wished for as we grew older especially jealous and petty individuals.  Even if you don't have much going on in your life, if you should crack a smile around mean-spirited individuals, they aren't the least bit jolly around you--they have issues that might not have anything to do with you.

Negative people look for ways to wipe the smile off your face and others.  They aren't going to welcome you with a warm demeanor, say kind words or do anything out of their way to assist you.  This is why we have to re-evaluate what part are individuals like this will play in our futures even if they have been there for us and "at times weren't so bad but..."  You have to know when to let them go and let God deal with them.

It doesn't matter if the toxic people in your life are parents, grandparents, workers, children, or best friends for decades, if folks are bringing you down, it's time to do something different like guard your heart for starters.

Nicholl McGuire is the author of Say Goodbye to Dad and other books.

When Decorating Your Home - Think of the Mood You are Conveying to All Who Visit

Repressed Memories - Childhood, Abuse, Family - Video Dailymotion

After a loved one dies, major tragedy, strange illness, or other odd things, our memories have a way of coming back to haunt us or bring peace.  Repressed Memories - Childhood, Abuse, Family - Video Dailymotion

Abusive Men in the Family

They exist and as much as relatives pretend that kin are stable and sweet, those who have been abused by them know better!  Check out Nicholl McGuire's nonfiction, self-help guide, Socially Sweet, Privately Cruel Abusive Men.  A great read for those who are just starting out dating once again.

My Family Bullied Me | MamaKatTV