Sunday, December 29, 2013

Never Assume Your Children are Loved by All Relatives and Friends

They are nerve-racking, needy, and demand attention in the eyes of those who aren't all that excited about children being in their presence.  Children are not well-received by selfish individuals with a million things on their minds, but spending quality time with the little people, teens or disabled youth. 

People who are often nervous, easily irritated and impatient with children need not open their hearts or wallets if they are ill-prepared to spend time with them.  Parents who think they are doing "a nice thing" by letting children visit with select relatives, who have displayed instability in the past, think again!  Distance yourself from the difficult, the toxic, and the downright crazy in your family.  What other relatives might think of your actions, your personal feelings about those who hold titles in your life, and your own reputation should have no bearing when it comes to making a decision on whether children should stay with family.

Some of the best parents, grandparents, educators, and care-takers of children are those who simply see them as human beings--not headaches.  They are patient, loving and kind when it comes to interacting with children.  They don't lose their cool over the littlest infractions.  Children will have accidents, won't always follow instructions, and don't always act or play nicely.  Rather than focus on a child's faults by berating them or making them feel worse because they are in error, the professional will listen to the child's explanation then speak to the child in a controlled voice, possibly firm, while showing them what they did wrong along with reminding the children what is the right way to do or say something.  The child is given a series of choices to make a wrong right.  Good behavior is often rewarded and consequences are consistently executed if there are repeated violations.  Lovers of children know how to sit down and converse with children and manage them in such a way that is fun, informative, strict or interesting depending on the children's personality.  Parents, who act in similar ways, ultimately get well-adjusted children who don't give their them too many problems.  However, when you place children in a stressful environment with stressed out people, anything is bound to happen!

It is best that children are not left with the angry drill sergeant relative, a menopausal Mable who believes only God will heal her condition, or a Bitter Bill who is still holding grudges against his own parents.  A parent is asking for trouble sooner or later when you take too many chances dropping children off with unstable individuals.  Cut back on work hours, time-consuming responsibilities, and other activities when you find yourself relying far too much on parents, grandparents and others watching your children.  If you can't be present at a relative's residence with your children or are unable to put a short time limit on visits, don't drop them off! 

Parents who are desperate for a babysitter should look for alternative care when children are obviously in distress before, during or after visiting with relatives.

Nicholl McGuire, a author/poet/speaker maintains this blog and others and writes articles for various websites.  Listen and watch video related to spiritual issues on YouTube channel: nmenterprise7.

No comments:

Post a Comment


Have a blog/product/service? Share it with visitors of our site. Feel free to contact to discuss your business needs.

Search This Blog

Other Family Blogs Worth a Look...


4th of July abandonment about us abusers abusive daughters abusive fathers addiction adult add/adhd adult sons and daughters adults and mental health issues advice African American children aging alcoholics ancestry ancestry dna angry men toward women angry relatives antisocial personality disorder apologies arguments bad news bad relatives bereavement bigotry black sheep blended families blog owner borderline personality disorder braggarts bully busybodies career caring for elderly parents cheapskates cheating child abuse children and mental health disorders christmas church codependency codependent cognitive dissonance communication community competitive relatives controlling parents controlling women crazy relatives cults cyclothymia daddy issues dating death deceased loved ones deceitful people delusional relatives demonic influence dependent personality disorder depression difficult family members disappointments discipline dissociative identity disorder distant relatives divorce domestic violence doubts dreams drug abuse drunks dysfunctional families emotional abuse emotional blackmail emotional flashbacks emotional physical bondage emotional vampires empaths enablers encouragement engaged enmeshed relationships entertainment estranged siblings evil people ex relatives exes exs faith family family abuse family activities family breakup family bullies family closeness family conflict family fighting family history family liars family lies family obligations family parties family planning family problems family resources family reunion family scapegoat family secrets family stories family support family survival family therapy family togetherness family traditions family vacation father daughter relationships fatherhood fault-finders feeling used foolish people forgiveness friends funerals generational curses gifts God golden children gossips graduates grandchildren grandparents greedy relatives grief guilt happiness haters healing healthy families histrionic personality disorder hoarders holidays house guests how to reconnect with family how to say goodbye to children humor husbands hypocrites hypomania personality disorder ill relatives immature adults immorality inlaws intermittent explosive disorder interracial relationships introverts jealousy lazy relatives liars lies loneliness love low T manipulation marriage medical history mental abuse mind control misers money mother mother-in-laws motherhood naivety narcissistic men narcissistic parent narcissistic personality disorder negative family members new year no contact with family obsession obsessive compulsive disorder offended relatives overprotective defensive relatives overwhelm paranoid disorder parental brainwashing parenting parents parents who play favorites peacemaker personal problems petty relatives physically abused podcast poems post traumatic stress disorder prayer prejudice prideful people prophets in the family psychology psychopath personality disorder racism racists raising daughters raising sons rebellion relationship abuse relationships relatives and babysitting relocation repressed memories reputation respect rich family members rude relatives satan schizoaffective disorder schizoid personality disorder school breaks seasonal affective disorder self-esteem problems selfish family members senior citizens sexism shopping sibling arguments sibling rivalry single parent singles without children social anxiety disorder sociopath personality disorder soldiers spiritual abuse spiritual family friends spiritual relatives spirituality step-parents stepmothers stonewalling strange relatives strangers stress strict fathers strong families stubborn relatives successful family suicide teens temptation thanksgiving the big dreamer toxic relatives trauma travel truthtellers visions wedding widows wisdom witchcraft wives work worry