Vulnerable, Burdened and Guilty - Does this Describe You? - men, women

When They Show Up - guests, visitors, family

Interested in Self-Publishing? 15 Minute Instruction with Online Resourc...

Severed the Ties Now Facing an Enemy 2 of 2 - arguments, difficult people

After the Holiday - family problems, friends - regret, guilt, gossip

When the Selfish Use Children - problem kids, challenged parents

Mom is Aging, Impatient, Rude and Forgetful

When Mothers Cry: Showing Love to Mothers: Divorced, Single, Married and Depressed Moms: Mom is Aging, Impatient, Rude and Forgetful: The older we get, the worse we could potentially come depending on how our body feels, the support system or lack thereof around us, and fi...

TYPES OF RELATIVES

Pushy Relatives, In-laws - when they force their will

10 Things to Do to Make You Happy Now

Not happy with how things are going in your life?  Looking for ways to spice up your dull and boring life?  The following list are things people have done and are doing to enhance their personalities and live the kind of life that makes them happy.

1) Seek adventure.  Thrill-seekers thrive on having a life that is exciting.  Some will plan what their next adventure will be while others will just spontaneously go out and do whatever they feel like doing at that moment.  Do what you always wanted to do and bring a camera along with you so that you will be able to reflect on the memory later that made you happy.

2) Visit a place without planning it.  As mentioned above, some thrill seekers enjoy spontaneity.  Take a drive down a road you have never driven, walk down a path you never trod and see a place you never visited.

3) Make plans to visit old friends.  Too many promises of “will do lunch”?  Time to set a date, time, and location between friends to catch up on one another’s lives.

4) Write a letter.  It doesn’t matter if the receiver is friend or family member, sometimes it is nice to express how you feel and tell stories about your life through the written word.  Who knows, this may be just the release you need to enhance your thoughts of happiness while making someone else happy to hear from you.

5) Purchase or create a gift for someone.  When you shop for someone other than yourself, you are creating a positive energy that will boomerang back to you in the future.   Helping someone else achieve happiness is key to finding your own happiness.  Subconsciously, you will find yourself desiring more ways to make yourself and others happy.

6) Take the bus around town.  Too often drivers miss out on the opportunities to really enjoy the environment they live in because they are too busy focusing on drivers around them.  Take some of the pressure off yourself and experience the world from a different perspective.  You will be surprised at all of the places you never noticed while driving.  You may find a place to visit that brings a smile on your face.

7) Research local colleges for classes you might enjoy.  Sometimes just reading about something new can take your mind off your problems.  Focus on learning about something that pleases you.

8) Find a new job/career.  Many people are not happy in their jobs.  While cost of living increases, their checks aren’t that is enough to make anyone unhappy.  You may be able to enhance your mood if you research what companies are paying more than the one you are with for the same amount of work or less.  Less stress, more happiness!

9) End relationships that are energy stealers.  Whether it is a friend who is a mooch or a girlfriend who takes up all your time, make a decision whether or not you want to keep this person around.  You may have family members who are also energy stealers, if so lessen the amount of time you spend with them.

10) Relocate.  Sometimes people tend to become unhappy when they realize the place they live isn’t all that it was cracked up to be.  If you find that your apartment, home, or neighborhood is giving you more tears, then smiles make every effort to move.  Your mind, body, and spirit will thank you later!

Nicholl McGuire is the author of What Else Can I Do on the Internet?

4th of July - Family Drama, Unresolved Issues Since the Last Holiday Get-Together

So some relatives have intentions of setting it off this 4th, there will be more than just fireworks in the sky.  Are you prepared for the pending explosion ahead with kinfolk who drink, smoke, and eat too much?  When we know we have toxic relatives, if we care anything about our spouses and children we keep them away from the drama.  However, when you are that one who is very much into family no matter how bad they are for you and others, then expect to be a part of their drama.

Many years ago, I was that child who witnessed much.  Arguing, physical fighting, and stealing went on with some family members.  While they swore up and down they were innocent, those of us observant kids knew better.  It didn't matter how much adults scolded us about listening and watching grown folks, we knew something was very wrong with people who eye-rolled, deep sighed, yelled, and threatened one another while carrying their share of demons that they smoke, drank, or brought to the holiday events.  But yet the mantra was sung year after year, "We're family...love family, stick by family...be there for family..."  Well I am much older now, decades have passed since I was told to go where I really didn't want to go, talk to people I didn't care to and let strange folks hug me that I didn't want touching me.  There was something wrong with them back then and to date, those who manage to escape death repeatedly, still have something very wrong now!

You see, I don't oppose family even though I bring much awareness to the issues that many folks wouldn't want me speaking about and am a strong advocate for going low or no contact with relatives.  I actually do care for them, but I don't care to be mixed up in dysfunctional mess that looks like this, "Love you today because you did something for me, hate you tomorrow because you didn't do for me when I called upon you."  Then there is the tug of war kind of relationship that some have with their favorites.  Pull them near when they want to step outside the box then come up with all sorts of ways to keep them there.  The gullible fall for the tricks while the discerning know better.

So like with all other holidays especially one like the 4th of July, think twice about who will be there, how long you are staying, and what is being served, you might be better off sitting this one out if you can't stomach the drama.

Nicholl McGuire is the author of Should I Go to the Party?

Sins of the Father: After Father's Day Blues