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Common Family Problems that Cause Distance Between Relatives

Family problems are often the root cause of distance among relatives. In many cases, these problems can be resolved through effective communication and compromise. However, there are also some family problems that are too difficult to overcome and can lead to permanent estrangement among family members. In this blog post, we will discuss some of the most common family problems that create distance among relatives.

One of the most common family problems that lead to separation among relatives is financial difficulty. In many families, one or more members may experience financial difficulties that cause them to feel resentful towards other family members who are not struggling. This can lead to arguments and even estrangement, as family members may feel like they are being judged or that they are not contributing enough to the family.

A major issue that has caused arguments and worse physical violence in families is addiction. Addiction can take many forms, from substance abuse to gambling, and can have a devastating effect on families. Addicts often lie and steal from their loved ones in order to support their habits, which can lead to a breakdown in trust and communication. Additionally, addicts may also become violent or abusive leaving victims no choice but to separate from them.

One way to tell if a relative has a financial problem such as gambling is if they start lying about their finances. If they're constantly borrowing money from others or refusing to answer questions about their income, it's likely that they're in debt and are struggling to make ends meet. Another sign of financial trouble is if your relative starts stealing. This could be anything from petty theft to embezzlement, but it's a definite red flag that something is wrong. Finally, gambling can be another sign that someone is having financial difficulties. Whether it's spending too much on lottery tickets or going to casinos on a regular basis, gambling can quickly become an expensive habit that leads to serious debt. If you see any of these signs in a relative, it's important to confront the relative and explain how what they are doing is impacting you and other family members and encourage them to seek help. 

Another family challenge is long-distance relationships. When this occurs due to work, caring for a relative in another state, or for other reasons, emotional cheating and adultery can arise. If you think your spouse or partner is cheating on you, it's important to talk to them about it. Adultery can often lead to divorce, and it can also cause family problems. If you're in a long-distance relationship, be sure to communicate with your partner frequently. This will help keep the relationship strong and may prevent any additional relationship challenges. 

Lastly, one common family problem is when work and other activities consume most of our time. It can be difficult to find quality time to spend with our families. This is especially true for parents who are juggling work and taking care of their children. As a result, many families end up spending more time apart than together. This can really put a strain on family relationships and make it difficult to connect with each other. Carve out some free time to address issues. For instance, maybe a parent isn't spending much time with children due to other activities; family members might have to have a family intervention that addresses concerns. Hopefully, all parties will be able to come up with a reasonable schedule.

If you are struggling with a family problem that is creating distance among your relatives, it is important to seek help. There are many resources available to families in crisis and speaking with a professional can help you develop a plan to address the issue and hopefully work towards repairing your relationships and rebuilding trust. Additionally, there are support groups available for family members of addicts which can provide much-needed guidance and understanding. No family is perfect, but by addressing these challenges head-on, you can start to heal the rift and build a stronger bond with your loved ones.

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Patience and Understanding Go a Long Way in Many Families - 6 Things that Close Family Members Have that Others Don't

Growing up, I noticed that some of my intermediate and extended relatives had very strong family bonds.  They were the kind of bonds that showed just how much they cared for one another.  Sure, they argued at times and wasn't always there for one another, but there was an appreciation, love and respect that family members displayed that couldn't be broken no matter what the situation!

Drugs showed up in the family, cheating, lying, stealing, and more, and even still, some family members were diehard about loved ones.  They didn't stop saying, "I love you...you can do better!  We are a family!  Let me get you some help.  I hate what is happening to your family, let's do something about it!"  The passion to assist, the determination to get someone free of their demons, and the kind of love that only a God could download into the spirit of man and woman was real!

So, I thought of what they did to accomplish that family closeness that some observers were simply jealous of and wished for that kind of bond among their own.

1) They listened.

When family crisis showed up, time was taken to listen.  Steamrolling over conversations, quick to name-call, running one's mouth about "you should...and you better..." nope not with these Good Samaritans.  They wanted to hear all sides and then they planned the work and worked the plan.  Judgments, bias, name-calling, and personal opinions need not be a part of their family discussions.

2) They encouraged.

These loved ones did the total opposite of what discouraging family members did to their relatives, they ensured the one they were speaking to that "everything would be alright...you will get through this!  I love you and you made a mistake--no one is perfect!  Do better next time."

3) They provided.

Unlike stingy relatives who held on to money like they could never earn it again, the generous kin did what they could to help.  They gave up not just money, but time to ensure that someone got to their appointment, someone was visited in jail, someone's house was cleaned, and another had no worries about yardwork.  They were present, in the moment, and all-too ready to open their wallets and/or doors.

4) They loved.

As much as it hurt some of them to let very troubled family members go, they still loved them anyway.  They refrained to talk ugly about them.  They loved them until their hearts couldn't take any more stress.  Before long, unfortunately some of those loving relatives were buried.  They left us with one piece of advice in their actions, "Know when to let go."  A few used to say that their kindness had been taken for weakness and they wished that at times they hadn't been so kind, but more firm with some kinfolk.

5) They grew.

As family reunions came to a slow end due to so many people passing away with dates so close together, it was apparent that the family was still pressing on, still growing, still helping, and still doing.  The elders supported family growth and didn’t frown or look down on those who became pregnant.  They realized that they wouldn't be around forever, so it was important that the family grow; therefore, they encouraged population growth, family closeness, and family get-togethers even in their absence.  There wasn't just one family member leading, but many kin were instructed to lead and to continue to keep the family ties strong. 

6) They believed.

Now after years of observation and participation in family events, there is still the belief that those who had been distant will one day come together and those that have been close will remain that way.  It doesn't hurt to believe even when others have given up.  Stay faithful, stay loving, and stay kind, you never know who is watching.

May God bless you and your family!

Nicholl McGuire is the owner of this blog and the author of When Mothers Cry, Too Much Too Soon Internet Dating Blues, Say Goodbye to Dad and other nonfiction books.

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